A business suit onesie? Tattoo 'lazy bum' on your forehead instead

Men's suiting just jumped the shark.

We applauded – lightly – recently when one US inventor had the foresight to invent the "commuter suit", a business suit with integrated bike-riding features.

Even though we could see compromises in its basic style, it's a handy bit of kit for office types who are deterred from cycling by the full showering and change-of-clothes rigmarole it often necessitates.

And a shift towards online tailoring  - where measurements are supplied and a suit run up quickly and efficiently without leaving home or via a quick visit to a scanning booth - caters to time-poor executives who don't mind trading a perfectly tailored fit for a convenience and price advantage.

Now comes the "Suitsy" – a one-piece, fully integrated men's suit based on the ubiquitous onesie.

As this video review from Buzz60 shows, the Suitsy connects the suit pants, shirt and jacket together into a single garment that zips up at the front. San Francisco-based inventor Jesse Herzog describes it "as if a jumpsuit and a business suit had a lovechild".

"Imagine looking professional but feeling like you're in pyjamas," he says.

(UPDATE: As several readers have pointed out, Herzog is not the pioneer of this concept. That honour seems to belong to Graeme Garden, as seen at the three-minute mark of this YouTube clip of seminal 1970s comedy show The Goodies.) 

The zipper on Herzog's creation is hidden behind the button placket in the centre-front of the shirt, and fake, immovable shirt cuffs are sewn into the jacket sleeves to create the impression of the perfect fit – until you move in any direction, when your deception will be revealed to the general ridicule of your workmates.


And that's only if the ruse lasts more than five seconds after entering the room. The one-piece construction – that's not an actual shirt under the jacket, it's a piece of fabric sewn between the lapels – won't look or move like a suit should. Instead, it will instantaneously single you out as spectacularly lazy, and cheap into the bargain.

Herzog - a real estate developer and former hotdog stand owner whose other claim to fame is being the world's first person to launch a hot dog into outer space -  argues Suitsy wearers will be "more leisurely", having saved the two minutes a day it takes to slip on pants, a shirt and a suit jacket in the traditional manner.

If you're that heavily invested in saving time, just get 'lazy bum' tattooed on your forehead instead - it will cost less time over the long run, and people will form the same opinion of your clothing choice anyway.

In comments following the Suitsy's listing on Betabrand, a crowd-funded online clothing design community, Herzog hints he is even investigating incorporating shoes into the design, and wrinkle-free materials that would enable wearers to sleep in the garment and roll directly out of bed and off to work.

Just how to respond when nature calls is not fully explained - many onesies incorporate a "butt flap" for quick access to nether regions, but this feature is (thankfully) not mentioned in Herzog's design notes.

Pricing for the Suitsy hasn't been finalised. It had received almost 2000 votes on Betabrand at the time of publication, although it's unclear how many votes are required in the 17 days remaining to ensure it goes into production.

Betabrand also lists for sale the pinstripe executive hoodie (above), and an entire page full of bike-to-work wear.

Would you buy and wear a business suit onesie? Leave a comment below or vote in our poll.